I was doing it wrong, all long

The day before yesterday, rising up from my bed I always have this habit of checking my views on Medium. As an avid newbie writer, I couldn't control my urge to see how was the response.

In fact, even if the views are low, it hasn't affected me that much, with that being said my views are drowning still.

Still, I didn't like the foggy agony of my mental state, which kinda ruined my enthusiasm at certain points. Even if I am headstrong with my opinions about my blog's attention, still a small quirk in my thought puts me down. I can say the fuck the views aloud, but somewhere it was hard to digest the fact.

I don't like this kind of mindset which is ruining my productivity and my purpose of doing this and letting this grow will get me to quit things especially the challenge of writing every day.

What's the fix?

Social media scrolls sometimes make sense, and it did for me. I love reading posts of entrepreneurs and achievers as they hold some tidbits, unlike other shit posts.

It was this ideology that hit me really hard. Don't do things just because you have to, instead of do them because you really want to.

A long pause, clouding up all my experiences kinda like a time travel indeed. Looking back on the decisions and choices I had made in my life, I did those just because I have to. I never really did something out of my own just because I want to. Never.

Those have to choices, drove me so far in fact even till now. What's the fix? How can I possibly quit this limbo once for all?

I started to work on things just because I really want to, for example, the blog you read every day without fail me hitting up my laptop typing shits out. I really wanted to...

If it’s for something that I had to, by the time the challenge would have been broken. I wanted to do this to experience the tough tides and I needed this push inside me.

By using this potential energy, which is something I did because I want to. I can possibly use this potential energy elsewhere, fixing the potholes up there.

Shifting this energy and healing other parts of my ruined life is something I gotta work on. Stepping into the new year with a change in mindset is what I am looking for and so do you…

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